This past week was hellish. Work sucked, but today I found out my rtpcr worked! So things are looking up, now to try and remember why I ran that rtpcr... So today at work I introduced myself to the japanese post doc, just because he helps me find a lot of the reagents in the lab and I realized, I didn't know his name, how rude of me. Well I introduced myself, little did I know we were going to have an all out discussion about life, politics, and etc..I am way to social for my own good. His accent was amazingly thick, but I think it's awesome how if you try really hard you can get used to a person's accent in a very short amount of time. It was a high pressure situation because he was asking me questions..so it was not a stand there and nod and smile scenario, I had to put a lot of effort in, but let me tell you, that guy is funny! :)
So this saturday, my friend and I did something that I should have done like years ago, well maybe actually like last semester (maybe not, my grades did turn out just fine last semester). Anyway, we decided we were going to stay in and study on saturday night, I went over to her place and her neighbors were playing bumpin' music, it was 9:30 and we both looked at each other like "what are we doing in second semester of our senior year on a saturday night?" Then my friend had a genius idea, she said let's study really hard until 11:30, *a solid 2 hours*, and then we will get ready and go out, with 2 hours of partying until bar time, best of both worlds. It was grand, I got some work done, then I showered and got ready, and had an awesome night! The only flaw in the plan, is the desire to play catchup with your friends who have been partying for 4 extra hours, results in a lot of shots taken, results in not being able to remember how I got home, or into bed. *oops* Ahh well we're in college and we're only young once right?
I think I am a very rational person, well at least it's in my nature to want to rationalize things. I realized a short while ago, some things in life, you can't rationalize, sometimes we behave irrationally, that is because we are human. With humans there is no black and white, we are complex, we do irrational things for complex reasons, sometimes it's best to not try to rationalize it.
I really don't understand how pessimistic people can live with themselves, I mean I get it, keep your expectations low and then when something good happens you are very pleased. I agree we should keep our expectations low about certain things, like expectations from friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, and people we work with. It sounds horrible, but really it's just protecting yourself. What I don't understand is why people keep their expectation from themselves low. That's stupid. If you don't hold high expectations for yourself, who will? That's self destructive people. I don't like surrounding myself with people who are always down on themselves, it's dumb, if you don't respect yourself, how can I? It may sound a bit bitchy, but it's true. I understand surges of negative emotion, with reason of course, but it's nothing to dwell on. Negative emotions are what you make of them, they can consume you if you let them, or not if you don't. At some point you have to tell yourself, I'm being dumb, it's time to focus on more important things. This sounds like a self help paragraph, anyway I guess that's all I had to ramble about.
This was seriously a ramble, extremely scatterbrained. It's been in my system for a bit I suppose. Even though blog is a funny word, it is a relaxing thing to do. Now I must go to classes, yeah yeah yeah :) Thanks for reading
